Simon Maltman Blogs

The links are below for a couple of free short stories 👀👿 Both were published by the excellent ‘Punk Noir’ magazine. I thought I’d have fun with trying writing a zombie story. I wrote two. The first has zombies attacking the Northern Ireland Assembly. In the second I’ve brought back my old ‘Bongo Fury’ character, Jimmy Black. Hope you enjoy them!  Devolution Z-  Read Here Bongo Fury… and Zombies - Read Here

Here’s a new short story for anyone who fancies a very quick read- it’s written as a single text conversation… for the craic.    Instant Massacring by  Simon Maltman   (Transcription provided  by Police Service Northern Ireland of text message conversation between Colin Irvine and Brenda Irvine.)   … ​ ​ Colin- ​ ​ Wheres me coffee?   ​ Brenda-     Brewing now ffs   ​ Colin-     Bet ur sitting on your arse, not even boiled the kettle yet   wink emoji   ​ Brenda-   ​ Angry emoji  Maybe you should  come downstairs and  make it yourself ! You’re  on the shitter I  bet. ​ ​ Colin-      Maybe   ​ Brenda-   ​ Not in the en-suite?!   ​ Colin- ​     Maybe   ​ Brenda-         fucksake  vomit emoji   ​ Colin- ​ ​   haha   ​ Brend a- ​ Every feckin night- nine  on the button you stinkoid! At least we’re  out in the sticks  where noone else can smell you .   ​ Colin - ​    True. Could just put it down to that ‘country air’  anyway .   ​ Brenda- ​ Your precious coffee is on  now .  xo   ​ Colin - ​